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Posts Tagged ‘drunk’

Never Hold Discussions With The Monkey…

Friday, June 5th, 2009


“Two pages or less, dammit!”

Our Paris correspondent, John, writes in with an ancestor of Pete’s Law, the replacement of all PowerPoint with a Word document no more than 2 pages long.

Apparently Winston Churchill required all reports to be submitted on one sheet of paper so as not to slow down the war effort. He was a man who understood that clear communication can sometimes be a matter of life or death.

As a result, he went on to beat Hitler, something of a presentation wizard himself.

Churchill left a lot of quotes that still live on in the Speaking Hall of Fame:

  1. The length of this document defends it well against the risk of its being read.
  2. I’m just preparing my impromptu remarks.
  3. In the course of my life, I have often had to eat my words, and I must confess that I have always found it a wholesome diet.
  4. He has all of the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.
  5. It has been said that democracy is the worst form of government except all the others that have been tried.
  6. I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.
  7. Mr. Attlee is a very modest man. Indeed he has a lot to be modest about.
  8. My rule of life prescribed as an absolutely sacred rite smoking cigars and also the drinking of alcohol before, after and if need be during all meals and in the intervals between them.
  9. Success is going from failure to failure without a loss of enthusiasm.
  10. Never hold discussions with the monkey when the organ grinder is in the room.